Mr. Yuk

When I was 4 my mom and I stopped into one of those middle of the mall hallway safety fairs. The people taught me all about poison control, but the only aspect I remember well is getting those neon green Mr. Yuk stickers. I was told to put the sticker on anything that was "yucky"...

Later, we went to a restaurant called Noodles. I ordered the children's lasagna. I loved my mom's lasagna. But this lasagna, when delivered, was... different. It had spinach in the middle. YUCK! Without saying anything, I reached into my mom's purse, grabbed out the sheet of stickers, placed one carefully on the top of the lasagna, and called the waitress over.

"This is YUCKY!" I said and sent it with her to the kitchen.

It was one of my earliest memories of being a ball-buster.

I can't help it. It's as much a part of me as the freckles on my face.

It seems as if this characteristic is either regarded highly (usually by my friends) or loathed (usually by my foes.) People usually either love me or despise me. I can see both sides of the coin. You always know where you stand with me, and I always tell you what I genuinely think when you ask for my opinion. This can be very refreshing and show those around me that I am open, honest, genuine, and trust-worthy. If I give you a compliment, you know I mean it. You always know that whatever comes out of my mouth is the honest to God truth. Or, it can be seen as rude, bitchy, judgmental, and overly blunt. Sometimes I say things people don't want to hear. I always warn them...

I was once told that being nice to someone I have an issue with is not fake, it's being polite. I beg to differ. Being nice to someone I have an issue with goes against every fiber of my being. Being neutral to someone I have an issue with seems to be the nicest I can get. And by neutral I mean ignoring them and trying not to be around them as much as possible.

However... I am working on it. Really.

Since becoming a mother, I have found that I am much better at governing myself and my words before speaking or reacting. I haven't mastered this skill quite yet, but I'm actively working on it.

Here's a recent example:

Someone asked me what I thought about a certain someone. In my mind I thought, "I hate him. He gives me bad vibes. He's stupid, ignorant, unmotivated, lazy, arrogant yet super insecure, and white-trashy. He thinks he's charming, but I see right through the act. He is BAD NEWS."

I may have thought that in my head, but this is what I said: "He's a douche."

So, see... I'm working on it.

I do think that the world would function better, however, if we all carried around a set of Mr. Yuk stickers in our belongings to place upon people and situations as a warning for all who follow our paths in life. They would be spared the lecture from us, we would be spared of the title of "ball-buster", and all the yucky stuff could just be avoided with one little neon green sticker.